Annoying Classmate

In my life I have had a great number of classmates, and most of them never say a word. Those guys are the best. Some of them have said a few words, and mostly just to fill the awkward silence, those guys are pretty cool too. But then there are the few people, who feel the need to add their own input to the lecture, or ask above the scope of the course questions for no apparent reason. Those guys are really annoying.

These people can easily be picked out within the first day of the class, with quotes such as "just out of interest", or "I realize you can't, but suppose you could...". Another great way to identify them is by perhaps their most annoying trait, asking a question before thinking about it enough to actually ask it. You can tell this has happened when after being called on they say "umm" at least 3 times before talking, and stumble around with their first sentence for what seems like an eternity for both you and the professor.

Another common aspect of these people is that they seem to be very arrogant about their knowledge on the subject. In college, the question "why did you come to this class if you already know everything" comes to mind. Now with the arrogance, if you have to work with them at some point, you must be very careful. They will seem to know what they are doing because they truly believe they do, thus it is hard to believe they do not. They put off an aura of proficiency in the matter, but in my experience, they often are very lacking.

Instead of gaining a wide knowledge of the subject (through following a well planned lecture on a broad subject perhaps), they tend to dive head-first into a very small section of the subject matter. This leads them to have a decent knowledge of one point, but little knowledge of the whole. And what is worse is that they usually only have one source, which may or may not be outdated. So do not trust their knowledge, as it is often not as perfect at they might have you believe. And if you find yourself in a class with them, just nod and smile when they talk, it seems to please them when you pretend you know what they are talking about or agree with them, because if you don't, they will not stop arguing with you until their point is proven(or facts have been given to prove them wrong).

Applause

Applause is a tricky thing to determine when it is appropriate. Since I am in training now, we have had people come in and talk about the company. They are not performing, they are not spending more than an hour doing the presentation, or making it for that matter. So do they deserve applause? I personally don't think so. But I can see why some people might think otherwise.

If you go to a famous researcher's lecture, they deserve applause. They took their valuable time to show you something awesome they have researched. But the HR people talking about why you shouldn't pee in police officer's car, I don't think they deserve it. Or the guy who talks for 20 minutes about the founding and evolution of the company, I don't think so either.

But some people do, and applause is infectious due to peer pressure. When a few people clap, the whole room is going to, because not clapping turns into an offense to the lecturer, and makes you an outcast. Only if the group is truly stoic can is sustain the claps of one or a few by collectively not clapping, can the applause be halted. And in my experience, that is very rare, and ends in the clappers feeling outcasted and even shamed by their inferior discretion.

Training

So I recently started training at Factset. During which I am supposedly going to learn how to better do my job, by learning about the company, a short C++ course, and some learning about tools and stuff. So I realize that I am back in school. Not college, but high-school. In college, you can not go to class as long as you know the material.

This is like actually important high-school. First, you get paid. And second, if you do not 'pass' the class, you don't have some ambiguous hit to your future, you lose your job. It's not, "you know, if you don't pass this class you won't get into college, and won't get a job". It is now, "you know all the time and effort you have put in your whole life, culminating finally in a job where you are a functioning member of society and are doing something you are at least interested in, well that time was all really a waste if you don't pass."

Now it's not like its hard to pass, since you are supposed to have the qualifications before going in, and there's not a formal 'test', but at least for me, there is a coding at the end that gets reviewed to "determine where you are put within your group". If you come off as not qualified, I'm sure you will be let go, sooner or later.

Man, super high-school sucks.

Party Enhancers

I recently went to a bat-mitzva. For those of you who might not know, this is where a jewish 12-13 year old girl becomes a woman, and there is a big party. At this party, there were mostly 13 year old girls, and old people. There were also people there whose job was to make the party better, by dancing with people, and being energetic. At first this concept blew me away. Having good looking people in a party purely for the purpose of getting others to feel less awkward about dancing, and at least make it seem like everyone was having a good time.

I did dance with one of these people for a little while, and it was interesting. I am not much of a dancer, but she was able to pretty much show me what I should do through her motions. This went on for like a song, then she went off to another guy on the floor, and my feelings of awkwardity returned, and I sat down. So was she effective? It could be argued she was, but I think her job was really to get me to want to stay up there, even after she left, which did not happen.

Eating alone in a resteraunt

I don't really know anyone in Norwalk, and I didn't feel like cooking again, so I went out to eat. There was this place called Black Bear, which seemed to have sandwiches and stuff, so I went there. When I got in, the waitress was already feeling awkward as she asked if it was just me. I said yes, and she brought me to a table and asked for my drink. Then for the rest of the time, it seemed like she was avoiding me. I folded up my menu and placed it off the end of the table, and she walked by it at least twice, before asking "need a couple minutes?" I quickly replied no, and gave my order. It was just a sandwich, which she seemed to not like.

Perhaps she was just angry that she would not get a great tip, because the order was small, but its not like I was taking away business, it wasn't crowded or anything. And my order was easy, and I ate fast (because when you have no one to talk to, you tend to get the job done faster), so she should have had no complaint.

So I spent a lot of time texting, and FB messaging, and it would have been a pretty decent dinner, if it wasn't for the awkwardness exuded from the waitress.

Stupid Questions

Man, I am blogging a lot this week, probably because I am bored, but I have had a lot of inspiration.

Anywho, I hate it when people ask stupid questions. The type of stupid question I am talking about is one that you are not really supposed to answer, or one you are no more likely to know the answer to than the asker. Like "Why is this so complicated?", or "it says ENTER TECHNICAL WORDS HERE, what does that mean?", or even "why isn't the dryer done yet?". They do not say it in a low, passive tone, to imply they don't really want you to answer, they say it loudly, to your face, with conviction and frustration in their voice. One person I know does this constantly, and its really annoying. They are just trying to have some sort of human contact as they vent their frustration with their current situation. I don't want to be part of your frustration. I will be happy to help you if you really need it, but you are a smart person, and can more often than not figure out the answer to the stupid question just as fast as I can, and being that I have to familiarize myself with the situation, whereas you are already in it, my assistance is almost always a waste of time.

AIM

AIM is great, it allows for mostly not-awkward conversation, in that you do not expect the other person to always be there, and you have plenty of time to think about your responses without the face-to-face or phone pressure to respond immediately.

But there are some times where it gets awkward. Like when you say something, then the other person is typing, and you get that little thingy saying they are typing. That thingy then goes away, and seems like its flickering, and your anticipation is growing. This tends to end in one of two ways: a block of text, or "yeah". In the first case, they have really put in a lot of effort, and made an in-depth response. In the second case, they either typed like one letter, then went away from the window, or they were constantly writing and erasing what they typed.

Another interesting phenomenon that I have witnessed is, you start typing, then you see that they started typing, so you erase what you had, in anticipation of their obviously more important message. Then they erase what they had when they saw you typing. Then you are left with no one saying anything for a good amount of time. This can even repeat itself.

The worst is when they ask you, what you had typed before erasing it. You erased it for a reason, so that is was never read, why would you want to say it? I always respond to that question with "nothing", which of course is a lie, but they shouldn't expect a real response to that stupid question.

Answering Machines

I hate leaving a message, most people do. But now I think I know why. You treat it as if it was an actual conversation, which it isn't. They are not there to respond, you are just talking. So what you should do is simply leave the information you want, and end the call. But what you actually do it have an introduction: "hi, this is ___", then you flounder around what you want to say, then leave a really awkward conclusion: "umm, yeah....bye bye".

Some of the problem is no one really expects to get the machine, so they are not in the right mindset. They were expecting a real conversation, and are in conversation mode, which requires the socially standard introduction and conclusions. But not only are those added in the recording, but people don't really know how to say what they want to impart. they did not expect to need to explain what they wanted to in what seems like a very constrained amount of time. People feel really awkward leaving long messages, and usually just leave it up to the return call to say anything substantial.

Speechless

Why, nay How is that word ever spoken in a self-referential present tense manner -"I am speechless". In its very utterance, it contradicts itself. I dislike when people contradict themselves, but to do it so simply, and without concern to what they are saying is ridiculous. And for it to be a common phrase, that is just unacceptable, why not just say nothing, or "I'm not sure how to respond". At least that way you are not outright lying, and you get the same meaning.

Independence

I believe that independence is very important. Being able to support yourself is a great attribute. this is because, if you are dependent on someone, then you are never truly free from their control. You do no have all the power over your actions, so you might be swayed to do things, or biased towards your supporter's ideals. I think that making and maintaining your own ideals and beliefs is very important, while still being able to have rational discussions about them, which could alter them. The point is, your ideals can be ever-changing based on new information, as long as that information is in no way biased, and being dependent on someone will make you biased.

Now, when in a relationship with someone (romantically I mean), it is good to be co-dependent. This means that you each rely on each other so some extent. I realize this will lead to some bias from both sides, but being in a relationship will do that anyway, so it cannot be helped. What I cannot support is a relationship with one party completely dependent on the other, while the latter has no dependence on the former. This kind of clingy relationship basically just erases the ideals of the former, and re-enforces those of the latter. There is no give and take, which is never healthy.

I suppose I should mention being a child. Children are dependent on their parents, and that is fine because they cannot be otherwise. Ought implies can. When the child comes of age, and is able to support himself physically, and mentally, then he should shed his dependence. I'm not saying you should oust yourself from the family, you should still love and care for them, but you should not be dependent financially or emotionally anymore. You should be finding the truths of the world, and making well-informed, unbiased decisions about your life.

The other side should also be mentioned. When you are a parent, you should be able to let your children go. You should be very proud when they become independent, and you should not try to force dependence onto them. And although this is not usually a consideration, you should by no means become dependent on them, at least until you are unable to be independent due to age complications.